CUP OF COFFEE ON THE WALL & ART OF GIVING

              CUP OF COFFEE ON THE WALL & ART OF GIVING

The (true) story related to cup of coffee on the wall goes like this. A man enters coffee shop and orders saying “Two cups of coffee, one of them on the wall”. He is served with one coffee and he pays for two and leaves the coffee shop. Immediately, waiter pastes piece of paper on the wall saying “A cup of coffee”.  After some time one poor man enters shop apart from other regular customers. He looks at wall and orders- One cup of coffee from wall. Waiter serves coffee to this man with dignity who drinks coffee and leaves without paying. The waiter takes off piece of paper from wall and throws in dustbin. Welcome to the fine art of giving!

A busy traffic signal in Nagpur/Bhopal or for that matter any Mini-metro - A luxury car stops at signal and waits for 80 seconds for green. Beggar child approaches car and knocks window near driver’s seat.  Lady driver of car opens window and quickly closes down without parting any money. Conversation starts among bicycle and scooter riders nearby on how miser owner of car is! Signal gets green and all disperse to various directions.

How on this earth can anybody on basis of one incident such as this stamp her as miser? There are donors in our society who donate silently, who do not prefer to give any money to beggars.  The difference lies in - some do it in retail while few others do in wholesale, some in organized manner while others at impulse! There are those who make noise while giving and others who keep silent and make it a point not to let others know what they are doing for the society. Donor may be individual, family, organization, or even a country.

Some of us have myopic view on donation and confine it to only money (cash). However, donation today takes many forms, sizes and shapes. Donation can of pair of eyes or whole body after death. Others donate blood, essential items such as food, and medicines in case of natural calamities. Volunteers donate time while doing social work. Musical program by famous artist to generate fund for NGO, appeal by Shah Rukh Khan for donation & request to buy a brick at Rs. 1,000 to build cancer hospital at Kolkata also fall under category of donation.

Way back in 2003, after earthquake in Gujarat, Israel, apart from other countries offered help. The unique feature was- Their rescue team had asked only for land to put their tents on. They brought even drinking water. They came, helped in their own way and went back quietly after they thought purpose for which they came was served well by rescue team.

 Indian philosophy says that donation is important but equally significant is receiver – who should deserve one.  

Following are some observations and reservations regarding donation:-

1-      We need to change perception that only rich donate. Middle classes, even Poor also donate; the difference is only in amount. On the contrary, the value of his (poor person’s) donation is much higher considering his net disposable income and share of that income going to donation.

2-      Purpose behind donation is equally important. Some donate to get concession in income tax (nothing wrong there!) while few others donate to fulfill wishes of diseased ones. Some donate at impulse after reading news item about poor child in need of help for open-heart surgery.  Some out of fear – of Lord Saturn.  Ulterior High Net Worth Individuals donate to gain status in society, some to gain Punya, few donate because they do not know what to do with surplus money. Complications arise in eye/body donation and purpose is defeated, unless family members are mentally prepared and informed in advance by donor.

3-      Frequency of donation is associated with quantity and to profession donor is associated. Those with fixed income (salary) have different kind of psyche than that of businesspersons who have variable income. Those who believe in luck and God donate generously but in wholesale. In nutshell, salaried income donors show more predictable behavior compared to businesspersons.

4-      Some do not believe in retail donation- to beggars. They normally donate to NGOs, educational institutes, even to their Alma Matter.

5-      Public memory is short; public memory is shorter in natural calamities. Media highlights places where maximum casualties occur. It is not this epicenter, which requires maximum help! The reason being- there is hardly any survivor there. The real place where help is needed is- lot of damage to infrastructure but human beings survive. Donors and NGOs rush for help to epicenter. After initial hype is over, nobody bothers for reconstruction. Real help is required after initial shock is over and survivors start their regular routine.

6-      Philosophy of some donors is- donate and forget! On the contrary, if donation is big, careful scrutiny should be done on how money is going to be utilized. This is done by corporate and by few individuals.  NRIs donating to NGOs in India insist on regular report on progress of project
7-      Not all of us are borne donors as mythological character – KARN in Mahabharata. Some of us are misers to core; others cannot afford to donate because they find it difficult to meet two ends. However, there are cases, where one life-changing event transforms ordinary person to donor. Normally these incidents are tragic and they change context of propose of living of individual. Rajshree Parmar Foundation in Pune is an example to prove the point. Visit to TATA cancer hospital to meet relative, long wait outside morgue in public hospital to take delivery of dead body of student who committed suicide, guilt in mind of not helping others in past- all can change attitude to donation.

8-      There is niche of donors who make it a point not to donate to temples. They know how offerings such as coconut, garlands are quickly recycled and can be seen in retail outlets outside temple after two hours. They instead donate to NGOs.

9  -      Some donors donate out of love and few out of guilt. Many expats who have settled in USA or Europe do not forget their motherland-India. They have feeling that they cannot do much –being away from India. Their donation has a multiplier effect due to dollar rupee rate.

10-   Some receivers of donation are on autopilot in sense there are many donors ready to help them. The reason being their social work gets lot of publicity. However, few other social workers are publicity shy. They need real help.

11-   Some donors ask the receiver to create a chain. This is found in case of scholarship to needy. When receiver later on does well in life, he is expected to help needy in similar way.

12-   In case of calamity- what to donate is important. Many have an attitude to clear unwanted things from their homes. We see photos of kids, who survived Tsunami, jumping on heap of clothes in newspapers and other media.

13-   Giving fish is important or teaching fishing is a matter of debate. Answer to this question is simple and complex both. In case of natural calamity- giving fish and in other cases teaching fishing!

14-   Globalization has helped to spread the word and internet is used for on line appeal.

15-   There have been cases where few announce donation in public meetings and later on back track. In spite of follow up, they do not fulfill the promise made earlier.

To conclude, donor has to take precaution that resources donated by him or by his organization are properly utilized for the needy or for general well being of society. Equally responsible is receiver who needs to utilize donation(wholesale) for the specified purpose.